Tuesday With Teri

Remember the opening scene for the Andy Griffith Show?  The father and son stroll down a path to go fishing as a catchy tune is whistled into your memory bank.  Well, I must admit that when my daughter agreed to go fishing with me the other day that is exactly what I envisioned.  Yep, my 19yr. old daughter was willing to go fishing with me!  Ashley quickly, eagerly even, agreed to go fishing with me on the first day of her spring break!  That is as amazing as it sounds.  No begging, guilt laying or shopping promises were used to achieve this response.  She seemed genuinely excited about spending the day on this mini adventure with me and I was thrilled.  My expectation meter began to rise.   As I prepared my tackle box (translation: located it) and collected our bait (translation:got pepperoni from fridge) my expectation meter elevated to soaring.  Soon my car was loaded up with our minimal fishing gear, a big blanket, snacks and our dog Hughie(a reluctant participant).  My mood was almost jubilant as we headed to our local dock .  The sun was shining, the sky a bright blue and the air was brisk.

          Apparently “brisk” air at the house means “blustery” at the water’s edge.  We battled significant gusts of wind determined to carry out our intended adventure.  After tethering our terrified Yorkie to the dock we settled onto a blanket to prepare the lines.  We set our hooks with the pepperoni slices and began to wait for the expected encounter with Mobycat, the large catfish known to be prowling the water near our dock.  I eventually heard the words I desired most on this day, “Mom! I think I’ve got something!”  I scrambled to pull my camera from my bag to document the victory.  She struggled and worked the reel as her rod bent almost 90 degrees toward the water.  Expectations were high.  The excitement in that moment for us both can not be put into words.  Neither can the disappointment we felt when we realized her “catch” was a case of her hook embedded in a large unmovable (non-fish) object.  Let me see if I can summarize the events which followed to reduce your reading time…Our large blanket took flight and is now resting on the river’s bottom.  The dog spent the entire time entangling himself around everything in an effort to eat our bait.  We learned that while Hughie did not mind “turkey” pepperoni, apparently the catfish have more discerning taste.  We finished off our endeavour by donating 3 hooks and some fishing line to the log collection at the bottom of the river near our dock.    Needless to say the day did not meet my lofty expectations.

         Usually when a day starts with such extreme expectations and then falls short  the result is disappointment.  But this day was decidedly NOT disappointing.  I felt tremendous joy as we left the dock .  I had spent the afternoon with my daughter and she had promised to go with me again someday soon!    My joy was not impacted by the circumstances or expectations of the day.   Too often I let my expectations determine my Joy.

         John 15 contains the words of Christ as He  tries to help His disciples understand just such a thing.  He knew they would experience disappointment in this world.  In verse 10 and 11 He tells them, and us, to focus on Him and we will know joy…”if you keep My commandments, you will abide in My love; …these things I have spoken to you that My joy may be in you and that your joy may be  made full.”    I want that kind of joy, His joy.  Joy that fills us even when the world does not meet our expectations.

            This week Steven, my 22 year old, started his work as an Emergency Room Technician at a local hospital.  This is an exciting answer to prayer and hard work.  He is happy with the direction his life has taken.  It is obvious this is a perfect fit for him.  He has many unique qualities which will no doubt be helpful as he continues down this path.  I am very proud of him.   He has worked extremely hard to earn the opportunity to assist doctors and nurses as they care for those in need.   That said, I must admit there is a big part of my brain that is screaming out,  “ARE YOU GUYS CRAZY?”.   I mean, this is   “Steven”  we’re talking about.  This is the young man who in high school started an organization called  “The Canned Meat Society”,  which espoused the fine qualities of Spam and its many uses.  The young man they’ve hired is the same young man who thought bringing home a caged squirrel would be a good pet idea,  tried to nurse a wounded bird  to health resulting in said bird being miraculously healed and flying around our house for about an hour, collected fast food uniforms and paraphernalia and could often be found behind the counter of such establishments even though he’s never actually worked at one.  Believe me, these are just a few of the many oddities and adventures Steven has brought into our lives just in the last decade…there is not enough room in this blog to recount all his exploits.  And yet, as difficult as it is to grasp, there is no doubt he is good at what he does and will be  a blessing to those whose lives he will have an impact on.  I know that all he is and is becoming is the result of God’s working in his life.  “My Steven”  could not possibly help save a life or help someone feel better, but  “God’s Steven”  can do all that and more. 

            I used to think something very similar to this about myself.  I have worked as a science and math instructor for high school students for many years.  My formal education did not include any instruction as a science or math teacher. I often thought of my employers, “ARE YOU GUYS CRAZY?”.  I mean, if they only knew how unqualified I was to do what I was doing they would have to let me go.  Although my employers all knew my educational background, I couldn’t help thinking the day would come when someone finally said, “Hey, what is she doing teaching?’.  I pictured the moment like the scene in “The Wizard of Oz” where they drew back the curtain to see the “great OZ” and discovered a very small man falsely creating a very large persona.  “Pay no attention to the man behind the curtain!” he proclaimed to them as they stared in disbelief.  My unworthiness and imperfections were so obvious to me, yet others did not seem to notice.

            Over the years I came to realize that it was through my imperfections and unworthiness that God worked the most effectively.  I eventually came to LOVE the opportunity to share with others how impossible it was that I was doing what I was doing with any amount of success.  It was God’s grace to me that He blessed my efforts, enabled me to understand and communicate to my students.  How often have you looked back at events in your own life and realized you had done something beyond your own ability?  Isn’t it when we are the least able, most weak or in our greatest struggles that we truly rely on God?  All of us, as we move through this journey of life in the flesh, are like the rather small man in OZ.   As we navigate through trials and triumphs with the grace  of our God we can all proclaim, “Pay no attention to the man behind the curtain…instead pay attention to our God who enables us to do all things through Him.”    I Peter 1:7-11 reminds us this “…do so with the strength which God supplies; so that in all things God may be glorified…” I Love how Jude describes our God in verse 24, “…Him who is able to keep you from stumbling, and to make you stand in the presence of His glory blameless with great joy…”.    The God who can take away our sin so we can stand blameless before His glory in heaven, will enable us to do all He has put before us!

Adjusting my position for the perfect shot, I exhibited my talent for sloth like movements.  The slight rotation of my torso, to achieve a better angle , is imperceptible…my target is unaware of my presence.  My trusted four legged companion sits reverently at my side as I steady my hand…things come into focus….the light, the colors, the trees and most of all…the bird.  My aim is sure, I take the shot…applying quick pressure to the button on the top of my camera.  The “capture” of my long awaited prey is evidenced in an image frozen for all of time on my computer screen.

          Okay,okay…so I’m exaggerating the scenario just a tad.  But it did feel a lot like that to me.  I had just refilled my bird feeder the other day.  I was anticipating an increase in avian visitors with visions of springtime dancing in my head.  March decided to enter our area like a lion.  We received a plopping of about 6 inches of snow.  As I passed by our window I saw several birds enjoying a meal from the newly restocked feeder.  I’d run to get my camera following several such sightings only to find them gone when I got back .  Then it happened…one of the female cardinals we believe resides in a nearby tree was gracefully perched on the feeder’s seed tray.  In my eagerness to get the shot, I bumped the glass and she flew away.   Now it was on!  The challenge to out wit and out wait the cardinals consumed me.  Ignoring the long list of better things to do with my time on a snowy day, I took my post at the window.  I propped my hand up on the window’s ledge and aimed my tiny camera at the desolate bird feeder.  I’m sure it was less than an hour, but it felt like I stood there for days.  Even Hughie, my Yorkie who follows me everywhere around the house in hope of getting in my lap when I sit down, gave up and sat on my foot as I stood like a statue.  Waiting, waiting…certain it would produce the photo I desired.  I was bored.  I knew there were more productive things to do, but I waited.  Then he came.  A bright red cardinal.  He allowed me only two photos before he swooped out of my camera’s range.  It was worth the wait.  Few things say good-bye winter, hello spring like the bright contrast of white snow and the brilliant red cardinal.  Winter will end.  The snow will melt.  The cardinal’s bright feathers will attract a mate and the newness of spring will begin.

          The perfect photo, a new season in life, both require waiting.  My life reflects my tendency to avoid waiting.  My microwave is more worn and used than my oven.  I replace my coffee maker with a new model each time a manufacturer claims to produce a faster cup of coffee.  My dishwasher is set on speed dry.  Even my nail polish is “quick dry”.   But I know, just as I stood at that window, that God often asks us to wait.  Trusting God to fulfill His promises, looking for what he intends for our future and knowing He is sovereign is a discipline to be practiced.  “I wait for the Lord, my soul waits, and in His Word I put my hope.  My soul waits for the Lord more than watchmen wait for the morning.” Psalm 130:5-6