Tuesday With Teri

       It’s that time of year again.  It is a season of “firsts” for many moms.  Maybe for you it is a first year of preschool, first year of kindergarten, first day of middle school, first bus ride, first day of high school, first day of college or first day of new job…but for each of you, I am sure the thoughts are similar.  “Are they prepared for all they will encounter?”, “Have I done a good enough job?”, “Will they remember what we taught them?”, “Will they get along with others?”,“Will they be happy?” these are questions moms across the country will ponder on the night before their child’s “first” day.

       It seems like only yesterday I too asked myself these questions on the eve of my son’s numerous “firsts”.  I remember the excitement mingled with anxiety as he entered each new doorway. 

       There was the dreaded preschool doorway, where I pried his tiny fingers from mine and cried all the way to work.  He had a great time and met me with a smile at the end of the day.  The kindergarten doorway was less traumatic since, at the time, I worked in the same school and knew his teacher well.  I recall slipping down the hallway to sneak a peek at how he was doing, his smile relieved my nerves. By the time he experienced his first day of middle school I was made aware of how much he had grown.  He towered above me as we walked through that school door.  The day he entered the doorway to his first day of high school, I had already spent hours in prayer.  His first day of college was filled with numerous doorways, some would lead to success, others to lessons more difficultly learned.  On the first day of his first real job(one in his desire profession) I was beyond proud of him, but praying it would be all he expected. 

       At each of these doorways I always wondered, “Is he prepared for all he will encounter?”,  “Have we done a good enough job?”,  “Will he remember what we taught him?”, “Will he get along with others?”, “Will he be happy?”.   This week I am preparing to see my son enter yet another doorway. 

        This Saturday my son is getting married! I am struggling to find the adequate words to express how happy this makes me.  He has found a wonderful young woman who is beautiful inside and out, but best of all, he has found someone who loves him.  She loves who he is and how he is…and I love her for that.  I remember the day my son took me to lunch and shared his heart with me.  His love for her was undeniable and he knew he would love her forever and was ready to commit that to her.  I knew in that moment I stood at another doorway with my son.

       Suddenly I found myself filled with the familiar excitement mingled with anxiety which accompanied all the other doorways in his life.  “Is he prepared for all he will encounter?”, “Have we done a good enough job?”, “Will he remember what we taught him?”, “Will he get along with others?”, “will he be happy?”….For the first time I stand at a doorway with my son and I know the answer to these questions.  I know, because I have had the absolute privilege of walking him through many other doorways in life. 

       I know that he will meet all that he encounters with all of his best effort, energy, care and compassion.  I know we have done a good enough job, because it was the best we could do and that has to be good enough.  I know he will remember what we have taught him, because it has all been reinforced throughout his life and he seems infinitely more attentive to these things.  I know he will get along with others, because we have watched him grow and establish great relationships.  We have tried hard to present a good example for him as husband and wife.  He is kind and compassionate and he is exceedingly genuine in all he does.  I know he will be happy, because he has chosen Crystal to be his partner in all that life holds for them.  He knows that to be happy does not require things to be perfect or easy.  He knows that being happy is the result of loving, being loved and knowing there is nothing God cannot handle when it comes to your life.

       Saturday I will watch my son stand at an amazing doorway in life, only this time, for the FIRST time, I will not be the one who walks with him through it….this time he will walk through the doorway with his sweet young bride.  Don’t let the tears I will no doubt shed fool you….my heart will be filled and overflowing with joy! 

       It started about 5 summers ago I think.  A sweet, and VERY pregnant, member of a young couples Sunday school class my husband and I taught asked if she could visit me during the week and spend some time in our pool.  This was the start of what would become known as Tuesday With Teri (The event from which this blog gets its name) .  With her encouragement I invited others from the class to visit our home and pool each Tuesday, 10am-2pm. 

       Every Monday evening Scott would clean the pool and treat the water in preparation for our Tuesday guests.  Each Tuesday morning I would sweep the back deck, put up the umbrellas and clear away any spider webs built in the night.  In addition to the pool, we would set up a small kiddie pool with a tent over it for shade.  Swim rings would be inspected for leaks and inflated as needed, extra towels and sunscreen would be set aside and I would place a small step stool in the powder room so tiny hands could reach the faucet.  The prep for each Tuesday was always easy.  I would look forward to my visitors as I enjoyed my morning coffee.

       Each family would bring their own lunches and snacks.  The only food I provided was in the form of perhaps the most inexpensive summer treat of all time, POP ICES!  Yep, long tubes of frozen goodness in unnatural fruit colors and flavors were a HUGE hit.  After most of the kids had taken a break from the pool to eat some lunch, I would bring out a tray filled with POP ICES.  I loved letting them pick their favorite color and marveled at how well behaved they were when trying to wait their turn.  It must have been hard.    I watched as they learned to share, be patient and make choices on their own.  For nothing more than a pop ice, they honored me with their companionship, sat with me on our stairs and often shared sweet conversation. 

       I loved seeing the moms care for one another’s kids and their needs throughout the day.  They were always supportive and encouraging.  I have felt much admiration watching these moms navigate motherhood with such grace and love.  Throughout my summers of Tuesdays with Teri, I saw young families grow and moms becoming confident parents.  I am thankful to my friends who came to lend helping hands to the moms and to give us another set of eyes keeping watch over the kids in the pool.

       I had the privilege of holding babies, visiting with moms and playing with their kids in the pool.  I was able to get to know each family better and met new friends each season.  I spent uncountable hours gladly responding to shouts of “watch me Miss Teri!” and being amazed at the courage of these kids as they discovered new capabilities and tried new things.  I adored the way little ones would cling to me until they felt confident in their life vest or arm floats.  These days will always be precious to me.

       Some days there were only a couple of families, many days there were too many to count, always there was just enough.  Some days were rainy and we’d put on a movie while the moms sipped coffee.  Some days it felt as if the pool would explode under the chaotic commotion.  Some days there would be a time when a burden could be shared, a tear shed, a heart encouraged or a concern eased.  All days there was laughter, giggles and pop ices. 

       No amount of splashing, shouting or laughing was too much!   After every Tuesday, the house and back deck would literally sigh and slide into an eerie quiet.  As I gathered up pool toys, deflated rings and floats, Hughie, my porky little Yorkie, would scour the crevices of the deck boards for remnants of goldfish crackers and cookies. 

       I am forever changed because of these Tuesdays which God brought into my life.  I count myself beyond blessed to have felt the joy of hearing little ones squeal my name, smile at me, hold my hand, and love me with a love only a child can bestow.   I can never thank these sweet moms sufficiently.  They have shared their families with me and allowed me to be a part of their children’s summertime memories. 

       This is the final “Tuesday with Teri” at our pool.   We are moving this month.  My heart is aching at the thought of quiet Tuesdays and still waters, but I am comforted in knowing that God has more than blessed me.   

       To all my moms and your sweet kiddos, those present and those who have moved far away….thank you is not enough….I have every splash, squeal and giggle ingrained in my heart.  As your little ones continue to grow into the amazing young adults I know they will be, may you continue to treasure them and remember, whether they actually ever say it out loud or not, they are always thinking “watch me….!” 

I am confident that the God who brought me to this day, and filled my Tuesdays with so much joy, will continue to care for the families I have grown to love.   I will continue to always pray for you all that you may….

 “…..grow in the Grace and knowledge of our Lord and Savior Jesus Christ.  To Him be the glory, both now and in the day of eternity. Amen” 2Peter 3:18